Consequences of comparing children
Comparing children can cause them serious psychological damage. The loss of the child’s self-confidence and the creation of anger and resentment in their kind hearts are the bitter consequences of this misbehavior of the parents.
There are many reasons not to compare your children with other children. Whether this comparison is with his siblings or the child of an acquaintance, exposing your child to such comparisons severely damages their self-esteem and makes them feel inferior. However, many parents make these comparisons when they see that their child is not as good as other children. Here are some important reasons why you should not compare your child with others.
Raising a child with high self-confidence:
An important point for raising a child with high self-confidence is to eliminate comparing your child to others altogether. You can read the unpleasant results of this type of behavior below.
It destroys the child’s self-confidence:
One of the most important reasons why you should not compare your child with other children is that it will negatively affect their self-esteem. Do you like to constantly compare yourself with others? Most problems with low self-esteem are rooted in childhood, so do not make them feel inferior.
Fertilizes his talents:
. Every child is a special person and has their own talents and abilities. What does it matter if one child is talented in music and the other is not? That child may be extremely talented in sports or love to read books . None of these talents is better than the other, just as no child is superior to another. Under no circumstances should you behave in such a way that they feel they should try to be like others.
It angers him:
Direct comparisons make children angry. Do you really want to create animosity between your children? Certainly not. Avoid comparing them after each other, even if you think they will not notice, because someone may inform them.
Comparing children and its consequences
Remains in his heart:
You may be surprised to learn how long the memories of these comparisons can stay in your child’s mind. Long after the last time you remember saying to your child, “Why can’t you be like your brother?”, Your child will remember how humiliated he felt. This message stays with them very quickly, even if you don’t really mean it at the moment.
Kambakhsh prophecy is forbidden
This also has risks. Over time, your child will absorb the message that they are not good enough and will gradually come to believe it. If you are not going to succeed, why try anything at all? And that is exactly what is happening. This way you prepare your child only for failure.
They grow at their own pace
Childhood is not a race to be first. Children grow at their own pace. But parents are often worried when they see their child walking or talking at the same age as their friend. There is no set time for children to grow, so there is no need to worry. Rest assured that they will grow in their own time.
The child’s selfishness results:
The opposite is true of these comparisons. It is wise not to compare your child with others in a positive way. Do you want your child to grow up to think he or she is superior to other people? Praising children is a good thing, but you must be careful not to constantly tell them that they are better and taller than other children. If you want to make them selfish and arrogant, you have not done them any favors.
Comparing your child to others gives them a negative self-image.
Being a parent is not a competition and you do not have to show other parents how much better your child is or worry that other children are better than your child. You just have to lovingly encourage them to believe in themselves and help them discover their abilities.
how about you? Did your parents compare you to other children as a child? If so, how do you think these comparisons have affected your personality?